Milk and Cereal MV

My Corona

This is the worst semester of my life.....


My Biology Professor just keeps releasing reminder of my assignments and quizzes, which in turn keeps reminding me of how fucked up my schedule is.

If it weren't for my Figure Drawing Professor stressing me out and me TRYING not to go red and choke a bitch, I KNOW I'd be on top of all of my other assignments in the rest.
I have a one track mind --- once I'm pissed, I don't focus on anything else.


My Intro to Business class isn't fairing any better.
I technically don't NEED this class for my Broadcast Media Production major, but it was recommended by last semester's guest speaker for SMPTE to at least learn the fundamentals so one doesn't get screwed over later in life.

My final class is Illustration, again NOT needed per se however, I plan to create an animation production and won't be able to hire help right off. It will be me, myself, and I.



....what's this about a virus?

Is this another Flu scare? Pretty sure my slapdash Medical Insurance won't cover it; had to pay out-of-pocket JUST for teeth cleaning.


....wait, what?
WHAT DO YOU MEAN CLASSES WILL BE MOVED TO ONLINE?!?!?!

I PURPOSEFULLY signed up for courses that DON'T use Distance Learning!

A Monster to Conquer

I like to tell a story to anyone who would listen......

It's about a girl who feels desperate all the time. She feels like she has let everyone down because of her stupid pride. Her Father had lost his true love and is now in an unrecoverable rut, her Mother had left them to pursue her lost happiness for she had married and had a child out of duty to herself. Since then, life had gone down-hill in her life and so, regrettably; she had to leave her ties towards education behind to help with financial problems.

Relief came to her family as she marched into her first job with pride, she loved what she did but was discriminated by her own co-workers for reasons obvious to her, her Father and her best friend. And yet, she continuously swallowed her pride so she could selfishly have spending icons for her own personal amusement. The more hours she worked, the less her heart-felled got and she no longer enjoyed the work. She completely lost it and as their final act of jealousy and hatred, they had finally let her go.

In time after the shock, she became devastated that she constantly ate; feeling like she'd be less trouble if she wasn't even born. Even though her friends and family tried to support her and lift her spirits, her grief began to consume her. And then, as her final act of regret and sorrow, she prepared herself for the eternal rest. With weapon in hand, she took one final breath and savored it before she pulled; six rounds had past and still she lingers like a depressed puppy that had just lost its master.

'Why?' she asks herself over again. 'Why can't I do it? Wouldn't it be easier for my Father and everyone if I didn't exist?' She continued to live on, still pondering for an answer to that question. To this day, she feels worthless, for no one will be so kind as to give her a chance. As if they had gotten their revenge on her somehow by selling their souls to the devil himself.

Along the way, she is reminded of her dreams and is asked to start writing again to reawaken her soul, but alas; she knows of no one who would read her works of art. She sends her talent world-wide, hoping that someone will love them and finally make her dream come true; but her whole life had passed her, and she was now too weak and brittle to continue. Sometime after, she passed on to true love and rekindled dreams with a frown on her wrinkled face.

With no energy to pick up another pencil, a stray tear falls from her eye, then she dies with a destroyed soul. Her dearest wish was to have at least one novel in bookstores before her tragic death. She had the talent, but so many people had put her down that it slowly ate her away inside.

I shed a tear, for I knew her well. Now, no one will ever drift away in love and fantasy without her feeling heartbroken.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Note: This was done during my Depression period - following my parent's divorce

Unknown

Lost in hallow and grief,

To trust your heart and mind;

Having lost your faith in yourself,

Your greatest fear becomes true.

A deep pain rising,

After so many years;

Finding out deceit,

in the worst possible way.

A person with no heart

no soul;

believes it's true;

The understanding of the world

being close to you.

This wound will never heal;

nor do I want it to.

Because the pain will be shared,

Always; from me to you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to life's betrayal

Lost upon...

Respect and Secrets:

a very close relationship

Memories and Arguments:

a very painful encounter

Love and Friendship:

a continued generation

An unseen urge in which you are wishing, watching; waiting in wonder.

Reality replacing all fantasy and pleasure with earned pain.

The folding years of a lost soul that shows the bond of sorrows,

   crippled and diseased of the mind.

For what you longed for....

A childhood best friend and a teenage companion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to Trust issues

The Breeze of Life

a silent sound that carries a spirit,

that flies without a whisper;

   is still in limbo,

but sours with grace.

a very thin string holds it steady,

while it is trying to break;

to end the magnificent plight

and slows the wondrous flight.

though with the endless bright color,

   very dim in the light;

it will not escape the destiny, of souring....

  finally one with the brothers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedication: PENDING

Silent Stone

Lost under the soil,

a soul above others.

Struggles through the dark pit,

stirs like a silent stone.

With the iron of truth,

our leader will carry on.

Blind all content paths

to catch a breath of freedom,

throw fear with bear hands;

keep our hopes alive.

A fearless warrior to make us survive.

With one hand free,

our struggle will have worth.

Dogs consume our fear,

Thrive, survive and hunger.

Pursue us throughout the state,

cut us off at every turn.

With a personal goal,

our fallen will be spared from vain.

Cries were finally understood,

heard from long ago.

Because of a feminist hero,

our fight was worth it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated:  PENDING