Lost upon...

Respect and Secrets:

a very close relationship

Memories and Arguments:

a very painful encounter

Love and Friendship:

a continued generation

An unseen urge in which you are wishing, watching; waiting in wonder.

Reality replacing all fantasy and pleasure with earned pain.

The folding years of a lost soul that shows the bond of sorrows,

   crippled and diseased of the mind.

For what you longed for....

A childhood best friend and a teenage companion.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to Trust issues

The Breeze of Life

a silent sound that carries a spirit,

that flies without a whisper;

   is still in limbo,

but sours with grace.

a very thin string holds it steady,

while it is trying to break;

to end the magnificent plight

and slows the wondrous flight.

though with the endless bright color,

   very dim in the light;

it will not escape the destiny, of souring....

  finally one with the brothers.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedication: PENDING

Silent Stone

Lost under the soil,

a soul above others.

Struggles through the dark pit,

stirs like a silent stone.

With the iron of truth,

our leader will carry on.

Blind all content paths

to catch a breath of freedom,

throw fear with bear hands;

keep our hopes alive.

A fearless warrior to make us survive.

With one hand free,

our struggle will have worth.

Dogs consume our fear,

Thrive, survive and hunger.

Pursue us throughout the state,

cut us off at every turn.

With a personal goal,

our fallen will be spared from vain.

Cries were finally understood,

heard from long ago.

Because of a feminist hero,

our fight was worth it.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated:  PENDING

In'Her'

This is a story of a girl: an overweight, black girl who had no confidence in herself, looked down upon by her peers and seemed to be an underachiever.

She spent most of her life alone in her room, lost in her fantasy world where everyone there would want to be around her, comfort her when she was sad and love her like she was their only. But - her world was only a safe haven, an illusion. And she knew that it couldn't last forever. She craved the things that so many people have already experienced: love, friendship...acceptance, but HOW to achieve it always eluded her to the point of her own destruction from the inside out.

As she slowly comes out of her shell, she found more and more pain and sorrow not from the girls, but the boys. They used her to get what they wanted and hurt her both physically and mentally, but she soon found the reason why she continued to live - by an unexpected introduction to her inner strength.

In the form of an elegant, strong, independent black woman in which the girl always wished to become -- Cheetahkit gave the girl something she had always craved the most...friendship! A person that BELIEVED she can do whatever she wanted and gave her the acceptance that the girl realized she deserved.

Cheetahkit had also given her keys to make friends with other people, which became the story of how she met her 'reflection', as she once again, witnessed another girl who was lost and alone. Enraged that the same incident could happen to another and that no one seemed to care, she took it upon herself to be this strong self - only to find that it wasn't going to be as simple as it sounded.

The girl realized that this good deed took a lot of effort. A lot of the words that she had kept hidden for so long were just starting to come out, but she still held back due to the fact that she was overcoming her shyness. Foreshadowed as a selfish loner by society, it took all the girl had to break free from her shackles that seemed permanently fused to her skin.

Her hard work had paid off, for she made a new friend using her own strength that she found within herself. She later introduced her to the original savior and though had words from time to time, seemed to be no blood-shed between them.

Time passed happily for the girl as she became closer and closer to her new friends, even found out a stunning fact that all three have their birthdays in the month of November!

Her life seemed less complicated - however, there is one more thing that she craves and is still searching for to this day. Will she find it? Was it meant for her? That is an unwritten chapter for her and a story for another day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to the girl I was to the woman I am now -- as well as the traitors who brought her to life. 

The Coming Star

As I wake behind the morning sun, I take one look around,

              Seeing how late it was, I scrambled out; with the night on my body.

      Soon realizing the bright star will be in the middle, I rushed through the day;

                                               seeking a faster light.

              

               With my trusty staff I hold, within the surroundings of my master;

                      I will fly like an evening star fleeing from the light I see.

               

                Further on, my body still, believing once that's my time to shine.

                                       Though the sun blinds my path.

  

   Further on, my light has gone dim for I had lost my nerve, but seeing the world's

                        pearls for the first time; make my path an easy one.

  For once again if I am left astray again, I will remember: the calm and coming star.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dedicated to : Paint Branch High School Marching Band - Years 1998-2000

Experiment

NONE

For those who are still following:

I'm not dead --- just gotten swamped during both semesters plus fighting Financial Aid.



I have moved on from the Green Coffee Bean Extract and the Caralluma Fimbriata pills mainly because it needs a in-between period of 30 minutes before one can eat.
That's fine, for some folks! I don't have the mental discipline for that!

And because of my Ma's diagnostic of Diverticulitis, I had to put away the Sesame Seeds; I still kept the Chia Seeds but have reserved them for the weekend (Sunday, to be precised) when eating the Grilled Cheese sandwiches.

I had added a product called VITA MISS Shred Liquispray to replace the pills.
The main reason behind it was the time frame: This allows you to eat 1 MINUTE after 5 sprays underneath the tongue!
The stuff is worse than cough syrup but it was highly recommended for those who want to lose a few inches in 30 days. If you were expecting to drop that second belly quickly, it's not gonna work out the way you planned but like I said previously; it all takes time.

....All this was exactly four (4) days ago :(


For my exercise regiment, I had signed up for Badminton classes in my Spring semester since I had to give it up halfway during the past Fall semester. I thought to wake up my muscles before I go back to Tennis...even this class has quizzes, tests, mid term and finals!! 




And now --- the sad news: My Ma's not the only one that went through a diagnostic but mine's not really a lifetime adjustment.

I recently had two extractions and in need of implants and crowning so it's draining our accounts. I also had to change my entire diet to "anything that's delicious" to "liquid and soft-food" until the procedures are completed.
So that means I got the info on the ins and outs of this torture.

I will be informing you all about this, so my ranting, for now is going into a new direction.

Stay tuned for the list of restricted foods I'm no longer able to eat for 7 months....!